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  A few minutes before eleven o’clock one of the bleeps became erratic for several moments then continuous. Jem looked up to see a flat line on the heart monitor.

  Chapter 4

  Acting without thinking, Jem reached for the buzzer looped to the bed frame above Jess’s head and held it down. In what seemed like hours but were in fact mere seconds, two nurses appeared wheeling a trolley between them. Mr Carstairs and another nurse appeared behind them. He started giving directions to the nurses with the trolley while the nurse who arrived with him escorted Jem to a bench near the door of ICU then hurried back to the bay Jess lay in and pulled the curtain around it.

  Jem sat on the bench in shock with her hands over her mouth disbelieving what she had seen. Beside her the ICU doors were pushed open and a woman and man in white coats were directed to Jess’s bay by the nurse at the nurse’s station. They briskly strode over and disappeared behind the curtain.

  Although she could not see what was going on, Jem still heard the continuous sound from the heart monitor. She could feel her own heart racing as she silently willed whatever the doctors were doing to work.

  Come on Jess. You can’t leave us.

  Jem heard a thump then the machine made a couple of bleeps before making a continuous sound again. She found herself wringing her hands while tense voices behind the curtain issued instructions. The sounds were repeated several times before being broken by an uneven pattern of bleeps.

  Had they disconnected the monitor?

  Jem sat there anxiously watching feet moving under the curtain surrounding Jess’s bay.

  No one is standing still. That’s a good sign, right?

  A short time later the trolley was wheeled out and the two people in white coats followed the nurses pushing the trolley. They didn’t appear to be in any hurry and Jem couldn’t tell from the expressions on their faces whether she was going to receive bad news or not.

  Ashen faced, she stared straight ahead, barely noticing Mr Carstairs walking towards her.

  I don’t know if I’m ready to hear this, she thought as he stopped in front of her.

  She looked up at him anyway.

  “Your sister likes to keep us on our toes,” he told her wryly.

  Her mouth feeling dry, Jem swallowed.

  “She’s okay?” Jem asked.

  “I wouldn’t go that far,” Mr Carstairs said “but give her time and we’ll see.”

  Jem nodded dumbly.

  “You can go back and sit with her if you want,” he said.

  She stood and nearly fell over but before she could Mr Carstairs pushed on her shoulders to seat her again then lay the palm of his hand against the nape of her neck and pushed her head between her knees. When he was sure she wouldn’t resist, he took his hand away.

  Jem sat there gulping breaths of air between her knees and felt foolish.

  “Perhaps you can go in a few minutes when you’re ready,” he suggested as though nothing untoward had occurred.

  She bobbed her head.

  A nurse who saw what had happened brought over a plastic cup filled with water.

  “Have a few sips of this. It’ll make you feel better,” she said kindly and pushed a cool cup into Jem’s hand while her head was still down.

  The cool plastic felt soothing in her hand and the cup made a crinkly sound when she gave it a little squeeze. After a minute when she felt she could sit up without feeling faint she did so and took a sip of water.

  Assured she was okay, Mr Carstairs moved on and the nurse returned to the nurse’s station. Jem drained the cup wishing it had contained something stronger to provide false courage. She was scared to return to her sister’s bedside, fearing she wouldn’t be able to handle something like that happening again.

  One minute turned to five and Jem tossed the cup into a bin nearby.

  You can do this, she told herself.

  She got up and forced herself to put one foot in front of the other until she was once again by Jess.

  The luminous numbers of the car clock were coming up to 2.00am as Jem pulled into the garage. She felt completely drained after the events earlier that night. Although Jess hadn’t flatlined again there had still been the odd erratic bleep on the heart monitor which kept Jem on edge.

  Dumping her shoulder bag on the breakfast bar in the dim glow coming from a table lamp in the family room, she tiredly realised she still had that report to prepare and email to Mark before going to bed. With a groan she reminded herself that she had to be up to get the kids ready for school and kindy in the morning. Mentally estimating how long the report would take she hoped that fewer than four hours sleep would be sufficient.

  Jem noticed the pocket doors to the lounge were closed as she walked as quietly as she could through the largely cleared family room. Eben must have spent hours tidying while she was at the hospital.

  She switched off the lamp and slipped into the empty guest room, grateful that Eben had allowed her to have it alone despite his threat of sharing. After closing the door she pulled her old laptop out of her suitcase. It was something she had wanted to upgrade for a while but she kept forgetting to ask Jason for his recommendation since she seldom needed to work remotely seeing as she was no longer a sales rep.

  Jason had several computers in his home office she knew he would be happy for her to use but she didn’t want to waste any time finding out whether she would be able to log on or not. She considered going back into the family room to work but she assumed Eben was sleeping on the couch in the lounge and didn’t want to make any noise which might wake him.

  Instead she plugged the laptop into a nearby outlet and sat near the head of the bed with the laptop on her knees and pillows supporting her back. As she worked she repeatedly drummed her fingers against the edge of the laptop every time she had to wait for the computer to execute an instruction which was unfortunately often.

  When she finally finished she set the alarm clock, changed into her nightshirt and wearily slid into bed. She reached over and turned out the bed light feeling exhausted but she had so many things running through her head she thought she’d never sleep.

  The radio on the alarm clock switched on and the room filled with the banter between the DJ and a caller. Jem stifled a groan. Surely it couldn’t be morning already? The blankets pulled at her side and the radio abruptly cut off. Had Drongo got on the bed last night and knocked the clock?

  Stretching an arm out from beneath the covers she reached across the bed and came up against a large warm object. The contact woke her far more effectively than the clock had. Startled, she looked at Eben who was tucking his bare arms behind his head. The motion knocked the blankets down and she saw his bare shoulders.

  Is he wearing anything?

  Pulling back she looked at him. He looked as tired as she felt.

  “What are you doing in this bed?” she demanded.

  “I told you this was my room,” he answered as he absently ran his fingers through his hair.

  Her scowl told him she wasn’t satisfied with his explanation.

  “I’m not about to sleep in Jase and Jess’s bed and the couch is too short. Besides the kids make too much racket in the morning and this room is warmer than the lounge and the door can be locked.”

  Eben sleepily grinned at her. “I figured that we can both be adult about this and share.”

  Jem silently fumed as she reached for her dressing gown and tied it across her short nightshirt. She wasn’t sure what annoyed her most, the fact his argument was reasonable under the circumstances or that his eyes were drifting shut and he didn’t appear interested in ogling her.

  Her mood wasn’t much better when she got out of the shower and dressed in the ensuite to find Eben had sprawled in his sleep towards her side of the bed.

  He must be really tired. I wonder what he had been doing last night to come to bed so late.

  Her eyes swept over the clock near his head and she gave a start when she realised how little time she had lef
t before Jeremy had to be at school. She closed the bedroom door softly behind her and took the stairs two at a time.

  Getting the kids ready was a nightmare. Daisy went back to sleep despite being woken twice. When Jem realised she still hadn’t come down she left Jeremy in the kitchen and went back upstairs to supervise getting her dressed. Arriving back downstairs she found Drongo sitting on the bench purring happily as he lapped up the milk Jeremy had spilt while pouring it on his cereal.

  “What would you like for breakfast Daze?” Jem asked as she nudged Drongo off the bench and wiped up the milk with a cloth.

  “Ice cream,” said Daisy as she plonked herself on the stool next to Jeremy at the breakfast bar.

  “Uh uh,” said Jem. “Breakfast food only.”

  “I never get ice cream for breakfast,” said Daisy and chose toast instead.

  Jem was busy for the next few minutes. She made Daisy buttered toast as requested and cut the slices into little triangles, not squares and filled their lunch boxes under Jeremy’s critical eye. Despite protests, his lunchbox included an apple and not nearly as many biscuits as he wanted. Between comments to Jem he still managed to wind up Daisy.

  “He’s looking at me, Aunty Jem,” Daisy complained.

  “Don’t look at him then,” Jem advised as she wrapped the sandwiches for the lunchboxes.

  Jeremy smiled.

  “He’s smiling at me,” Daisy complained.

  Jem looked up and caught Jeremy changing his expression to one of innocence.

  She grabbed his empty bowl. “Go and brush your teeth and do your hair.”

  Daisy grinned at Jem’s terse command.

  “She’s smiling at me,” Jeremy complained.

  “Well you won’t see her from the bathroom,” Jem said as she loaded the bowl and spoon into the dishwasher.

  Daisy’s smile went up a notch and Jeremy thumped her on the shoulder as he went past.

  “He hit me!” Daisy complained.

  Jem belatedly realised the noise the kids were making could wake Eben and decided to give a response which should halt any further escalation of the argument.

  “He’s gone now and I’ll step on him like a bug if he annoys you again.”

  “Good,” said Daisy.

  After putting the lunch boxes and drink bottles into the respective bags Jem raced up the stairs to get Aidan up. When she came down she found Daisy watching TV instead of eating her toast. She switched it off as she walked past.

  “Mummy lets us watch TV,” Daisy complained.

  “You can watch it if there is time after you’re ready for kindy.”

  “I never get to watch TV.”

  Jem gave Aidan his coco puffs and groaned inwardly as he spilt chocolate milk down his top as he drank from the bowl after the cereal was gone. She took him upstairs to change and silently hoped she could get the chocolate milk out of his light blue skivvy.

  “Come and brush your teeth,” she briskly instructed Daisy upon her return who instead of getting ready had found her my little ponies and was spreading the herd around the family room.

  “I never get to finish my game,” said Daisy as she reluctantly trudged upstairs.

  By the time she got them cleaned, groomed and in the car Jem glanced at the car clock and was relieved to see they could just make it to school before the first bell. She was even more pleased the children were all still alive. There had been moments...

  She turned the key in the ignition as the garage roller door lifted.

  “I want to go to the toilet,” said Aidan.

  “We’ll go when we get to school,” Jem told him.

  “I want to go now!”

  With a sigh Jem turned the ignition off and turned to look at the three faces in the back seat. “Anyone else want to go?”

  “I do,” said Jeremy and Daisy together.

  Chapter 5

  Jem hoped her day would improve but with the morning she was having it didn’t seem likely. The school bell rang as Jeremy opened the car door so he raced to his classroom, leaving his school bag in the car. Aidan disappeared while Jem was hanging up the bag on Jeremy’s peg and was lost for several stress filled minutes until he was found three classrooms down, absorbed watching tadpoles in an aquarium.

  Arriving at kindy, Jem fastened Aidan into his pushchair but while she re-tied Daisy’s shoelace Aidan took the opportunity to unlatch himself and climbed out. After a pursuit where she managed to flush him into the relative safety of the kindy grounds she retrieved the pushchair and returned to discover he had found the paint table, coated his fingers with paint and was busy spreading it on nearby surfaces.

  With a groan Jem hurried over and suggested he use the large sheet of paper clipped to the easel.

  Aidan complied with glee while Jem hunted for something she could use to clean up the paint. A passing kindy teacher came up to admire his work.

  “I’m sorry about this,” Jem apologised. “If you give me a wet cloth I’ll wipe up the mess.”

  “Don’t worry about it,” the teacher replied as they observed Aidan move to a stack of magazines “He’s a busy boy.”

  “I know,” agreed Jem as he started turning the pages, leaving smudges of paint on them. “Do you think there is something wrong with him?”

  “Heavens no!” the teacher exclaimed. “It’s good that he’s interested in trying things out. All the bright ones are. I’d be more concerned if he was content to sit there and do nothing.”

  Even with that endorsement Jem felt frazzled as she swept into the entrance of North Shore Hospital with Aidan in tow. He’d been vocal about leaving the kindy then she had to endure the stop-start driving joy of commuter motorway traffic while he howled from the back seat.

  As she herded him toward the elevator because he refused to be carried Jem wondered how Jess coped with the children on a daily basis. Reaching the elevator as it opened she lifted Aidan up so he could press the button of the floor that contained intensive care. Aidan quickly pressed every button including the emergency stop which started a loud ringing sound. With a look of apology to the middle aged couple sharing the elevator she disengaged the alarm.

  When they got out the middle aged woman looked annoyed as she stabbed the door close button. Jem couldn’t blame her as they were going to the top with scenic stops on every floor thanks to Aidan.

  She dragged Aidan through the double doors to the intensive care ward and went to Jess’s curtained bay. A different nurse was writing on the chart as she entered. Mindful of the many buttons available to press she picked Aidan up and propped him on her hip. He immediately reached for his mother’s ventilator tubing and started shaking it.

  In horror Jem prised his fingers off and moved back so it was out of his reach. Jess lay unresponsive on the bed. Jem pinched her lips together to keep the stinging in her eyes becoming tears and to prevent herself berating Aidan. The nurse hooked the clipboard back onto the rail at the foot of the bed, looked at Aidan then looked at Jem.

  “She’s doing better this morning. Her signs are stable,” he told her.

  Relieved to hear the good news Jem sank into the chair near the head of the bed and moved Aidan to her lap.

  “I am so pleased to hear that. You can’t believe how much,” she told him.

  “The consultant saw her on his rounds half an hour ago. He’s pleased with her progress and has said we’ll be taking her out of her induced coma tomorrow afternoon all going well.” The nurse smiled at Aidan slipping off Jem’s lap. “I bet he keeps you busy.”

  Jem grasped the pole of the drip stand that Aidan was attempting to push across the floor. The lines tautened where they were taped to the back of Jess’s hand.

  “You have no idea,” Jem replied.

  After texting Jase, Mel and Eben a progress report then reading a few messages regarding work she needed to do, Jem sat in the car and wondered what she would do for the next hour until Daisy needed to be collected from kindy. Aidan’s behaviour had been diaboli
cal but then it was asking too much for a two year old to stay put and to stay quiet. She had decided to leave after Aidan managed to unplug monitors, which had brought everyone running.

  Her cell phone played Beethoven’s Ode to Joy from her shoulder bag on the passenger seat. Jem idly wondered why someone would be ringing her from work as she answered.

  “Jem!” Cherie’s voice exclaimed in relief. “I am so glad I got hold of you.”

  “What’s the matter?”

  “Just work but that can wait a moment,” Cherie said, dismissing the subject. Her voice took on a tone of concern. “How is your sister doing?”

  Aware of Aidan in the back seat Jem didn’t want to say anything which he might pick up on and scare him.

  “She had a rough night but she’s holding her own now.”

  Jem bit her lip at the thought of helplessly watching Jess lying motionless when the heart monitor flat lined.

  “It can’t be easy,” Cherie offered.

  “It isn’t,” Jem confessed quietly.

  She swallowed then straightened in the front seat.

  “What can I do for you?” she asked assertively.

  “It’s the venue in Glenfield for the Saturday reception. They have another group who want to use their centre at the same time we do who are offering more money. They have decided that they need their deposit within the hour otherwise they’ll give it to the other group.”

  “That’s not very professional,” Jem said.

  “Tell me about it. I think they know that we’d be unlikely to give them repeat business so they’ve decided to make as much money out of the situation as possible. I was going to send a cheque by a courier but the traffic is so appalling I don’t think they’d get past the harbour bridge before the hour was up.”

  “Would you like me to pay the deposit?” Jem asked.